When we last left our heroine she was...

... thinking about how her hair sucks balls now. As I said on DA, I went in to get my bangs cut and get my hair layered a little - then the chick cut my bangs way short and gave me this weird fucking bowl cut. So basically my hair sucks balls now. Yes. Also as I said I was really pissed at Bri for giving me the 'what a fucking slut' look Friday night. The movie was good and the position I ended up in (totally comfortable by the way) wasn't entirely my fault. And he kept petting my hair, it was really sweet. Like if a guy she liked wanted to cuddle with her during a movie, whether he liked her or not, would she really not do it? But rant is over, I'm sure she didn't mean to give me that look, etc, etc. Ugh. I hate my fucking hair.

Fruuuustrating...

I've been feeling so stressed lately, but there's nothing to be stressed about. I'm freaking out about the random numbness I've been getting in my arm and foot and Dylan is totally ignoring me (not gonna get all girlishly emotional about that...). I just can't relax. Ugh. Good night.

That's just S.A.D.

Yipee, another Singles Awareness day *sarcasm alert*! I get to spend Valentine's Day singing to an angry three year old! Woot!! Mason's my valentine. oh god, grady just signed on... ugh. He's actually been leaving me alone for the most part lately, he's been annoying this other girl, Morgan. I wonder how long it'll be until she too realizes how creepy and irritating he is... I was really hoping that something would happen today, but that was just my silly romantic notion; of course nothing would, it never does. Oh well... I'm gonna go be emo and watch Monk with my brother and Shari... lol. Byeee

What is up with this?

So I went to the movies last night with Brianne, Megan, Jason, and McNamara. Last time I went to a movie w/ him (yes, I still like, him so shove it) he was sitting next to me but went to get popcorn and Megan stole his seat. When he got back he was really pissed at her, but I assumed that he was mad because that seat was closer to the middle. Then this time he did the same thing (sitting next to me) and before he went to get popcorn he was like "okay, seriously, this is my seat. megan if you take my seat then I'm going to kill you" which was weird because Megan's seat was closer to the middle than his. When he got back he ended up (somehow) with his arm around me. It remained there for the entire movie (I was worried that it might fall asleep >.<) until I went to the bathroom (I went a. because I had to pee terribly and b. to give him a chance to remove his arm without being awkward). When I got back, not only was the arm replaced but he also put up the arm rest in between us and, in an amazing imitation of the 7th grade couple in front of us, I ended up pulled to him with my head on his shoulder (and getting huggles during all the stupid parts of the movie). After it was over we went to Starbucks and there was a steady stream of his slightly awkward sex jokes (the ones you always assume he makes at everyone) directed solely at me... I'm starting to think maybe (just maybe) he likes me... Also I couldn't sleep until 5 in the morning because my dad was running a virus scan on my computer and now I'm sooooo tired... ya... :D

God, Again With the Daddy Issues

It just goes on and on! I've been sitting here playing spider solitaire for the past hour while Stephen was watching The Daily Show (w/ headphones as per my dad's 'request'). Finally my dad sits down and starts watching with him (hypocritical bastard, you're not allowed to scream and rave about the evils of mind melting television, then sit down to laugh at Jon Stewart). So Stephen (since the headphones aren't all that comfortable) asked me if he could turn off the mute. I said it was fine, I wanted to watch The Daily Show too, but my dad says "NO! Don't unmute it!" I waited a little while, then asked why... the answer was (almost word for word): "Because I want to be able to walk away at any time and have peace in the house." I reply "But if you want to leave we can just mute it again!". His answer is "Do you have any reason for wanting it unmuted?" "Because I have my hair in braids and it's uncomfortable to wear headphones." He rolls his eyes in pure derision and tells me "You either watch it muted or not at all!!" "But...!" "I swear, say one more word and I'll go and cut the cable now." *pause as he walks away* "Jackass." This is my life. This is my life. Please don't let this me my life.

Ooooh, I'm Sorry. The Correct Answer Was:

I FUCKING HATE MY DAD!! He's such an asshole! I can't even describe it! He twists everything you say into an argument to use against you! He just now told me that I'm a selfish idiot who thinks everything's about me. Wanna know why? Because I yelled at him to stop making pig noises. Don't laugh because it's seriously not funny. For basically all my life I've been futiley trying to be a vegetarian because I was raised, by Shari, with an immense amount of compassion for the hundreds of sentient creatures slaughtered every day so that gluttons like me can take comfort in stuffing their faces with death. But for some reason I just can't do it! And everytime we eat meat, I'm sure that's an exaggeration but it seems like every time, he makes these stupid animal noises, imitating what we just ate. Every time he does it I tell him to stop because it shoves in my face the fact that by eating that meat I made myself a hypcrite. So this time I told him to stop, but he kept doing it, so I totally blew up and shouted at him to stop. Then it was silent for a long time. When dinner was over he asked me about it, the same way he always does. Calm, polite, friendly, joking even. I always think 'maybe this time will be different, maybe he won't shove his stupid arguments down my throat, maybe he'll listen resonably to what I have to say' but it's never different. Never. So when he asked me why I think he makes those noises, I told him 'I think you make those noises because it irritates me. Not that you know the reason that it irritates me, just to irritate me.' he went on to tell me 'You need to think that maybe it's not (insert derisive, mocking tone here) all about you. Maybe I'm just making those sounds because I feel like it! I'm not going to stop making animal noises at the dinenr table (again with the tone) just becauase YOU tell me to!' so I told him 'Every time you make thoses noises I tell you to stop, it obviously bothers me, so why can't you just stop making the sounds?' and he tells me 'You can't just make everyone around you do what you say! It's your fault, not mine! I'm not making you miserable, you are.' That's when I started crying and walked away, like I always do. Like the idiot I am. He mocked me, he insulted me, he made me cry; because I asked him to stop making pig noises at the dinner table. What the fuck am I supposed to do with my life?

Taking Cues

Ahm gunna copee juuuu!!

Yes, you heard right Brie, I'm about to do the exact same thing you did.

Name: Simone
- S'ok, never liked it that much, but it could be a lot worse XDD. It allows me to look more like your sister Brie (we all have French names >.<)

Appearance: 5'3", 140 lbs; long, curly blonde hair, too pale, blue eyes, normal facial structure, don't like my nose (too wide and annoying), chubby cheeks (blahh), nice cheekbones tho. Very average, very curvy (I like to say not fat... but it's not really my call XDD), not bad on muscle (I can run 2 miles... woot), too big hips.

Clothing: Black or teal/black jeans, t-shirt or tank top, converse or boots or birkenstocks, hoodie. That's pretty much my entire day-to-day wardrobe... woot. I will admit it - I love shopping... just not at designer stores for $500 scarves. Try Target, Hot Topic, H&M, B&N (lol). I like shooooooooooes.

Personality: I'm feminine... right? I mean... I wear make-up, I do girl stuff... I MENSTRUATE AND HAVE BIG BOOBS, ISN'T THAT FEMININE ENOUGH?? Lol, jk. I'm a total nerd/geek and wouldn't hesitate to kick someone's ass (except Pat's... he's kind of scary), but I'm femenine :D I leik boyyyz. But boys don't like me ;g; *sadness* Except Nate. But I don't like Nate. I mean... boys like me... but they don't LIKE me.

What I look for in a guy: Normal hair, brown or dyed, smart, funny, kind of romantic (but not creepily so). Someone I could just hang out with (you know... friends with benefits XDDD). Nice eyes, funny, not into sports (or at least not obsessed with them). I don't really have that high expectations; just a nice guy.

The World: It can be so beautiful, and it's ours for the taking, but we, being stupid, selfish teenagers, look around us and see a bleak, desolate wasteland. We don't look at the blooming roses or raspberries in winter. We don't see the 2 weeks of upcoming vacation (just the 2 weeks of school before it). Everyone says how terrible our world is, but it's also the most beautiful place we'll ever see in this like (it's the only place we'll see!!). Someday the world will open it's arms to us and the emo teenagers will realize what douchebags they are.

Peace out :D